Christmas Day has come and gone. We made skinny crepes, ripped through family gifts, sipped coffee, laughed and stayed in our pj’s most of the day. It was so special in so many ways. And then there is only so much sitting around you can do before you want to gnaw your arm off.

Our friends in our new neighborhood have become extended family, so yesterday we ventured into Napa for a pint-sized crush.

As you can see, my 2-year old has become a player (“playah” as his dad says). While I plant smooches on his full cheeks, he’s learning to pass them on to younger girls.

I have to admit though, my eyes have lingered on this picture while my mind fast forwards. The innocence of it is something that grabs a hold of me, and nestles within the deepest cavities of my heart. Because I know in several years that phones will ring and dates will be made. He’ll have another kind of first kiss, hopefully a heartfelt proposal, but inevitably, a heartbreak or two.

Milo, as your mom, I’ll try never to forget your soft, squirmy toddler hand in mine, those plump little lips on my ear (they aim and miss my cheek), and those stiff arms slung around my neck in that cute awkward hug. The way you now say, “Mommy, sit down. Come Heyuh” (you still can’t say “here”). Just know that I’m always right here with you in that special way that only moms can be.

Tomorrow morning, we see a new fertility doctor… so I am especially sentimental. My hope is to give you a new brother or sister in 2014.

It seems like just yesterday, my eyes locked on yours in the delivery room. Just yesterday, you reached for your toes.

No matter how fast you grow, no matter where this world takes us, you’ll always be my first little crush. The little guy that brought on this intoxicating amor.